Let’s face it, superheroines are hot. They typically wear tight clothing, they are normally fit beyond all reason for all the strength and (at times) children they have, and because they are more than an ordinary human, they are that much more unattainable. Just take a second and think of that girl/lady/woman that you sit next to in class, or buy your coffee from in the morning, or are working with on that big project at your job. Now think of her dressed up as Wonder Woman or Black Widow or Black Canary. She’s at least 10 times hotter, isn’t she? Of course she is.
So in celebration of Halloween, the second most likely time of the year for girls to be dressed up as your favorite superheroine (the first, of course, is convention season), and in celebration of the fairer sex over at Marvel, I bring you my list of Marvel’s To 10 Hottest Heroines!
#10. Jean Grey
This saucy redhead was a founding memer of the X-Men and the gleam in at least two men’s eyes. Despite being completely devoted to Scott Summers (Cyclops), like all girls, she had the major hots for Wolverine’s bad boy attitude. Whether you like her in her original Marvel Girl costume or either of her tight Phoenix outfits, she’s always been easy on the eyes. Just don’t mistreat her, or she’ll destroy your planet and wipe you out of existance.
#9. The Wasp
Speaking of unattainable… Janet Van Dyne is kind of like the Paris Hilton of the Marvel Universe. She’s rich, beautiful, and in the early days, seemed to care more about her outfits than she did the good she was doing for people. She’s messed around with Tony Stark and Clint Barton (Hawkeye), but if there’s one guy that can almost make us feel better about our chances with Jan, it’s Hank Pym. Yup, even though she could have anyone she wanted, she keeps going back to that crazy, nerdy, little scientist that has spent more time off the deep end than sane. She’s even been his punching bag when things were really tough. She may be dead now, but if she ever comes back, maybe a normal dude could have a shot at her.
#8. Gwen Stacy
Oh, Gwendy… She’s the all-American girl next door. There isn’t a single guy reading this that hadn’t had a crush on girl like Gwen Stacy. She was Peter Parker’s first love and the only person, other than his uncle Ben, to have such a large posthumous effect on his life. I don’t know if it’s the hair band she always wore, or the pencil skirt, or the knee high boots that gives her that little extra sex appeal under the ridiculously cute exterior, but you can’t help to go ga ga for this blonde. Whether you liked how she was written in Spider-Man 3 or not, you can’t say that Bryce Dallas Howard wasn’t at least a hundred times cuter than Kirsten Dunst.
Honorable Mention #1 – Susan Richards
Ol’ Susie Richards, or The Invisible Woman, might just be comics’ #1 MILF. She’s smart, she’s gorgeous, and she’s very maternal. Okay, in the early days of The Fantastic Four, she was kinda treated more like eye candy to be scoffing at those big, scientific doohickeys that Reed Richards would create to save their hides (and boy, some of the dialog would make the most chauvenistic man whince), but nowadays, she might just be the most powerful member of the team. For all the loyalty to Reed and devotion to being a mother, the girl still has to have a little fun. She’s definitely attracted to Namor, the Sub-Mariner and doesn’t exactly do the most convincing job of resisting that oiled (fish oil?) chiseled Atlantean, so you can’t really blame Namor for being hung up on her.
I have to say that the furry thing really doesn’t get my motor running. In fact, I find it kinda weird (no offense to anyone that has that particular thing). However, when it comes to Tigra (a.k.a. Greer Grant), I’d definitely reconsider my whole position on it. She makes no bones about her sexuality or her sex drive or her sexual appetite. I’m guessing that you’d know how well you did by the tone of her purr. Huh… Come to think of it, maybe #7 isn’t quite high enough for this feline hottie.
#6. Ms. Marvel
Carol Danvers might be one of the more normal hotties in all the Marvel Universe. She’s not particularly skinny. Her boobs, depending on who’s drawing her, aren’t always defying gravity in some really odd way that would make quantum physicists scratch their heads, and she doesn’t really have perfect facial features. Also, based on her character history and how long she’s spent in the Air Force, you have to reason she’s not a spring chicken. My point is, here’s a woman in her mid-thirties (probably), who isn’t exactly perfect (she is a recovering alcoholic), and probably pretty insecure about herself. Being in my early thirties myself, that makes her really, really, really hot. ‘Nuff said.
#5. Mary Jane Watson
MJ is not only one of Marvel’s biggest leading ladies, but she’s become a Hollywood star too. The free-wheeling, fun-loving, redheaded scorcher had one of the biggest debuts for any character when she uttered the words “Face it Tiger, you hit the jackpot!” to a gaped mouth Peter Parker. Oh boy, did he ever too. He would later marry this anything-but-a-girl-next-door looker and it wasn’t for his life as Spider-Man. It was because she really has a heart of gold. She may love a good party and she may want all eyes on her when she enters a room, but there is nothing she endears more than her hubby and personal hero. She may be waaaaaay out of our collective league, but at least the one guy who most of us identify with the most won her heart.
#4. The Black Cat
Jeez O’Petes, Parker… You’re killin’ us here with the girls that are all about you. Well, The Black Cat is really more about Spider-Man and not puny Peter Parker. I’m really crying for you. I mean it. I’m heartbroken that Felicia Hardy is more into role play than she is your brain. I mean, sheesh… Gwen Stacy? Just your average knockout blonde. Mary Jane Watson? Oh, she’s just your run of the mill MODEL AND ACTRESS. Give me a break, dude. The Black Cat brings bad luck wherever she roams and to whomever crosses her sexy path. Frankly, she crosses my path, I’m not seeing it as bad luck. I’m going to get a face full of cleavage and tight, black leather. That is, until a piano drops out of the sky and crushes me.
Honorable Mention #2 – Kitty Pryde
When I think of Kitty Pryde, I think of that girl in high school who was always really cute, but easily overshadowed by the head cheerleader. She’s usually sitting with a small pack of people, probably your pack of people, at the lunch table. She probably doesn’t say much, but when she does, it’s terribly awkward. She stumbles something on the ground, or her own feet, at least four times in any given day. When it’s all said and done, and you’re out of high school for a couple years, you suddenly realize you are madly in love with her. Naturally, you lost all contact with her about six months after graduation and now you’re completely lovesick and pounding your head into a brick wall to punish yourself for not realizing, way back then, this girl thought you were the greatest thing since sliced bread. She thought you to be the bee’s knees and had every little piece of your memorabilia stapled to her bedroom wall while you were the total putz staring at Miss Smiley Perkybreasts McCheerleader. And to make matters worse, all your friends and all her friends knew it but never said a damn word. Yup, that’s Kitty Pryde you just overlooked, you knucklehead.
#3. White Queen
What is there to say about Emma Frost that isn’t painfully obvious? Oh, I got it… THE GIRL TYPICALLY WALKS AROUND WEARING ONLY LINGERIE. Not only that, she can hear your thoughts as you drool over her, so you gotta know she enjoys the stares and glares. She probably just hears a constant rumble of “homina homina homina” over and over and over from every guy’s head. Remember when I said that Janet Van Dyne (The Wasp) was one of those rich socialite girls like Paris Hilton? Emma Frost is one of those too, but she’s a stone cold bitch as well. If… IF you were lucky enough to hook up with Frost, she’d probably know exactly how to get you off by simply talking down to you. That’s how much of a stone cold bitch she is and just how good she is at it.
#2. Black Widow
Natasha Romanov is one seriously badass chick. She’s a trained Russian assassin and probably the best spy in the Marvel U. She’s worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. She’s led the Avengers. This fiery redheaded vixen could sneak into your house while you sleep, kill your maid, and make off with all your secrets without you even knowing it. And if she needed to seduce you (like that would be very hard anyway), she could fill out a cocktail dress like nobody’s business. Her most famous romantic escapade was with Matt Murdock. Ol’ Hornhead even shared his title with her back in the 70s. Currently, she’s shacking up with the current Captain America, James “Bucky” Barnes. I guess you can say that the US and the former Soviet Union are still making great bed partners since the end of the Cold War… Giggity giggity.
#1. The Scarlet Witch
Oh, Wanda, my love… How it pains me to see what you have had to go through. First, Brian Michael Bendis gives you a bad case of the insanity causing you to reshape reality and kill your closest friends. Second, Jeph Loeb makes your creepy relationship with your brother that much more creepy before killing you in the Ultimate Universe. Oh, how I yearn for you to return to the four color world of my dreams. Yes I know your brother, Pietro, would never approve of our relationship, but I don’t care. We will find a way to make everything right…
Oh… Um… I actually was typing there, wasn’t I? Oops. Uh… Yeah, so I really really really like Wanda Maximoff. And as a side note: Sure she may have a weird relationship with her brother, Quicksilver, but Angelina Jolie has a weird relationship with her brother and people seem to still think she’s pretty swell.
So… That’s it for my list. Hope you all enjoyed it and didn’t spend too much time away from your work or whatever else you might be doing googling hot comic girls. If you want to check out more lists here on A Comic Book Blog, click here. Have a good one and thanks for reading!
Still want more?
For more lists like this visit our COMIC BOOK LIST section section for articles like the Top 10 Comic Book Girls I’ve Crushed On & Top 5 Comic Book Fan Q&A about the Disney Marvel buy.