What makes a good party guest? Physical attractiveness would probably be on the top of most people’s list. Sense of humor? Interesting day-job? Ability to shoot fire from their eyes? Super-Heroes have these traits in spades, with their perfect bodies and wild lifestyles. But in reality, the best people to invite to a party are simply your friends. The people you like and who are most like you. So here we present to you the Top 10 Best Superheroes to party with.
10. She-Hulk – Lawyer to the Stars
Jennifer Walters is Bruce Banner’s cousin. After a blood transfusion, she gained the ability to transform at will into a gamma-powered bombshell. But the most interesting thing about her isn’t her body or ability to lift a tank, it’s her history as a lawyer in the freaking Marvel Universe. There, even the simplest legal case can be made interesting thanks to superheroes. Property disputes involving the Baxter Building or Avengers Mansion. Drunk drivers operating time machines. Labor laws pertaining to ageless, immortal children. Just think of all the interesting stories she’d have to tell about not only the cases she has worked on, but those she’d heard about during her time practicing superhero law.
9. Green Lantern – The Thrill-Seeker
Even before Hal Jordan received a ring of limitless power, he was a test-pilot with a thirst for danger. He’s admitted that his entire life has been one long exercise in proving that he’s not afraid of anything. Cue the theme music to “Jack Ass.” Hal Jordan would BE the entertainment at your party. He’d take any dare you can throw at him, from jumping off the roof to drinking that weird thing that’s been in the fridge for a year. Plus, with a GL ring that can create anything, he can dream up a sweet sound system construct for your house AND make a sound-proof protective bubble around it so as to not piss off the neighbors.
8. King Mob – The Guy who Blows your Mind!
King Mob is basically Grant Morrison with superpowers. Assuming Grant Morrison doesn’t already have superpowers, which is a discussion for another time. This is a guy who has been to all the best clubs on Earth, taken all the wildest drugs, and has explored the deepest and strangest aspects of the human mind. And even if you didn’t want to have you mind blown by stories ranging from mere scorpion gods to the true nature of existence, King Mob is still a pretty down-to-earth guy who likes to drink and discuss the newest music and literature has to offer.
7. Power Girl – The Cool Chick
Yes, Power Girl is attractive. It’s one of her main defining attributes. But beyond that, this grown-up Supergirl just seems like a really cool woman. Her sense of humor and dead-pan acceptance of her body, her powers and her convoluted history suggests she’s not the type of person to take things too seriously. She’s the type who would talk to a geeky guy at a party if he had something interesting to say, or talk sports with a jock, or just drink any dude under the table. In short, she’s just one of the guys, all the while being a lot better to look at than the average guy.
6. Kid Flash – Super Teen
Imagine if the kids from Superbad had superpowers? That would be Kid Flash. Clever, smart-mouthed, and just grateful to be there, he’s hyper-active without being annoying, always has something funny to say, and is the kind of kid who could hang out at an adult party without acting immature, or worse, trying to act like an adult. He’d also be especially handy if you ran out of food and needed to make a 7-11 run quick. I mean REAL quick. And when the party is finally over, he can help you clean up in under a second.
5. The Thing – The Cool Older Guy
Sitting at your dining room table, playing Poker and smoking a cigar, the Thing would be a perfect center-piece at any social gathering. He’s been everywhere and done everything. And now that he’s gotten that whole “I’m a Monster” chip off his shoulder, there’s no chance of him scaring people. The Thing is that insulting kind of funny, pointing out people’s flaws in a way that is as brutally honest as it is hilarious. He’s got that perfect mix of anger and exasperation that makes so many older people fun to be around. Basically, he’ll say anything, and he just doesn’t give a damn.
4. Mary Jane – The Original Party Girl
The title says it all. Mary Jane was created to be the Wild Child in buttoned-down Peter Parker’s life. She’s an actress/singer/dancer/whatever, ensuring she has no problems cutting loose in a crowd. She loves to be the center of attention, thankfully without devolving into the “Loud Drunk Chick at a Party” stereotype. And best of all, while on the surface she seems like a girl who just wants to have fun, MJ is actually a pretty deep person, dependable and loyal to the people she loves. Meaning that if you manage to get a quiet moment with her, she’ll be as much fun to talk to as she is to dance with.
3. Zatanna – The Girl who knows Magic
Magicians are always awesome to have at a party, especially in fishnet stockings. Despite the pure entertainment value of a woman who can do ACTUAL magic tricks, summoning monsters and turning water into wine coolers, Zatanna’s ability to open doorways to other realms and teleport people can ensure that a quick change of venue can enliven any dull party. Imagine suddenly partying in the Bahamas or in King Tut’s tomb. It also means she can turn any annoying jerk into a rabbit or make them literally talk out of their asses for the rest of the night.
2. Deadpool – The Funny Guy
Deadpool is like Spider-Man, only funnier. It’d be like having Family Guy at your house, only a superhero instead of a cartoon show. His attempts at making a joke that breaks the Fourth Wall would inevitably end with a frustrated Deadpool taking a sledgehammer to one of the walls of your house, but you wouldn’t care, since the randomness would be just too funny. Like the Thing, he’ll say anything, and like Hal Jordan he’ll do anything. His cutting remarks about the various trends in superhero comics will probably piss off the other guests, but as long as you’re laughing, who cares?
1. Tony Stark – The Iron Man!
Tony Stark would be the best party guest ever. Like some glorious combination of Hugh Hefner and Charlie Sheen (back when it was cool to like them), Tony Stark would show up to your party by landing a jet on your front lawn, bringing with him an endless supply of money, booze and super models. And unlike Bruce Wayne, Tony isn’t pretending to enjoy partying, he really does. And also unlike Bruce, whose alter-ego is the worst party guest ever, Iron Man is pretty much just Tony in an Iron Man costume full of armor that shoots lasers, plays MP3s and records the whole party on video and puts in up on YouTube. Tony Stark is a living party!
So there you have it. The Top 10 Best Superheroes to Party With. These guys and gals know how to have a good time and bring a party with them wherever they go.
Who are some heroes you’d add to your invite list?
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